Today, as anyone ought to know, is the last Friday before Easter, aka, the last meatless day of 2011 (for Christian omnivores at least). I don't know about you, imaginary readers, but I'm getting pretty prettay sick of pizza. Don't get me wrong, pizza's freaking awesome. But generally the awesome level is entirely dependent on the amount and variety of meaty toppings. Your average plain cheese, not New York pizza weighs in at about a 2.36 on the awesome scale, just about on par with a photograph of Disney World. You know, not an actual experience, but containing the seeds of some radical memories. On a side note, New York pizza ranks in at 3.4, the same level as a meaningless conversation with a beautiful stranger. Memorable, delightful, but painfully short-lived and in the long run, absolutely unnecessary.
Well sick and tired of this dreadfully monochrome Friday diet I'm taking advantage of a little lent time loophole. This is God's game after all, we've gotta play by his rules. But that doesn't mean we can't bend them. I mean pilots do it all the time! Flying around the earth and whatnot. Pffft.
I'm staying up till midnight, when it is no longer Friday, to cook a steak and maybe go get some baconators for the hell of it. You know, obey the Wendy's drive thru slogan and "eat great even late!" because I'm dying for some freaking meat! You imaginary readers of the vegetarian persuasion are just mad as a bunch of march hares. Literally! You know, cuz hares eat nothing but grass! Get it? Haha ha! Seriously though, My hat comes off to you. Not only do you somehow magically spit in the face of carnivorous temptation in defiance of an evil system, but you are also reading this and also imaginary! You should be the president for jiminy's sake!
Dude, you didn't even do that! I was up at 12 and would've loved if we went out to get some meet! Also Wendy's doesn't stay open all night, they're only open until 11. We would've had to gone to Micky D's for some Big Macs. Which for the record I have never had.
ReplyDelete